Camping was fun. Being Idol, Even better!!
I just came back from camping at Raffles Marina. It is near tuas checkpoint. I know it's very far away. But missing my mum is even more devastating. Anyway, I think that the camp is very fun. There was Kayaking, Rock climbing, Low ropes, Amazing hunt and many more fun stuffs. But the most fun is Archery. I love it!!! Especially the trainer, Rozita. Yes. She is so cute and very sweet. I think she has the sweetest smile I've ever seen in a woman. I'm not being a lesbian or anything. I'm just saying that it's very difficult to see a smile so sweet from a girl. Anyway, I love archery to the max cause I shot 2 balloons!! Woohoo!!!!
Then comes the Idol during the campfire. I was the winner. I was so happy. I can't stop smiling since then. My competitor is Mel, who had an album in school. When I sang When You Belive, Azlan (trainer) gave me a balloon!!! Hahhaha!!! I was stunned and speechlees!!! NO one ever did that to me!! HAhahaha.. But thank God that I won!!! Thanks to ALL who have Supported me!! Thank U!!!!
For me, I missed all the trainers there, especially Rozita and Izza Don. They are the best people I have ever met. The most understanding and the most supportive people!!!! I really respect them so much!! Also, I miss the view there. Missed the sea view and all the yacths docked there. hahaha... It's a very beautiful view!! I love it!! Yeah, I wish I could enjoy more of the camp if I didn't have my period!!! EEeWW!!!!
O-V-E-R!!!
Today, is the 22 November 2005. I shall declare that it's the end of my O Levels for me!!! Yahoo!! Oh yea!!! I'm so free!!! Yohoo..!!! Anyway, I hope real hard that I can pass this time round. Right, I'm reali happy that what needs to be over is finally over now!! Yeha!! I finally can forget and don even bother about some people around me. Yea, particularly people who with the middle name "Evil!". So, buzz off asshole!! You are not worth it at all! There. I've said it. Hah. To whom it may concern, Goodbye!
Anyway, back to reality. Christmas is only 33 days away. I think. I'm so happy. Although I don't celebrate X'mas, BUT I love the feeling. All the christmas songs playing over the radio. I like it. Seeing all the Christmas trees around shopping centres are so beautiful. I love it!! hahaha...
So, till, then, I shall come back again!!!
Rocking around
The Christmas Tree
And Happy Holidays!!!
Updating....
I am back. Sorry for not writing. Why am I apologising anyway?
It seems that no one's reading this. So why bother right?
Yea.
Right, anyway, my mom had an operation. This is not the kind of operation where I did to myself.
It's a real one. My mum is suffering from Lipoma. A condition where there is a lump just beneath the skin. However, it is a non-cancerous growth. But, my mum is worried that the growth will affect her hand, as it has been growing for the last 2-3 years.
So, when the surgeon was explaning, the operation procedures, I was so worried. Plus, the doctor said that there are risks to this operation. Risks such as, the lump might be growing next to the nerve. So, under any circumstances, the doctor might have to take away some of the affected nerve as well. At that point, my mum and I were confused and at the same time worried. So, after much deliberation, she agreed and signed the letter of consent. The doctor said it will be a 2 hr operation. So no fuss!! Great,
Then, my mum went in for the operation. She went in at around 9:30 and guess what time she came out? 2:30pm!!! Hah!! So much for 2 HOURS SURGERY!!!
When I saw my mum's hand, it looked like a kebab!! No offence Mum!! I am too explicit! haha..But my mum had to be admitted in the hospital for a night. So, I practically spend the whole day and evening there. I almost became a part time nurse there!!! I looked after my mum as well as one of the patient there who kept asking for tissues. I also held the training nurses to clean my mum up!! Cool huh?? There are some preety nurses there and some handsome doctor in training. Some caucasions. Cool!! hahah.
But when I went home that night, I miss my mum terribly. I couldn't sleep a wink. Argh!!! But luckily she came back on Friday. Phew!! Anyway, I am thankful that the operation went out just fine. My mum nerves was not affected.
Well, that's about it.
Re-Vamp. Immediately.
I need to do some Changes. But don't know whether it'll work.
Firstly, my room. I need to get rid of stuffs.
Stuffs like
> School Books
> Old Magazines
> Unused stationery.
> Story books.
I need more space in my room to cater to the things that are dumped by my parents.
My room is actually equvalent to a Store Room. Anything you want, you can find it in my room. Except for money. Also, whenever I want to find something in my room, I have to be mentally prepared as the time it will take to find something will take forever. No kidding. The on the plus side however, I will discover new things that I thought were gone!! It's a feel-good feeling when I discover things. In short, my room is like a time capsule!! haha!!! [Learn it from Hi-5!] Good Huh?! Educational as well.
Secondly, it's gonna be ME. I'm actually mentally unstabled. Yep. I'M GOING MENTAL!! I mean I just don't know how to react to different situations. Situations like purchasing an item. I don't know whether the item is worth it for me to use or not. Or maybe the item is too expensive for me. Another situation would be when I'm being reprimanded. At times, I would get realli angry and feel like shouting my lungs out to whoever is scolding me. At times, when I get reprimanded, I would tell myself that it's ok, I'm the one to blame. See? I realli don't know how to react to situations. One more thing, I don't have a permanent style. I mean, every now and then, I would like this particular thing and then then next thing I know, I don't like it already. Then, when someone buy a bag or something, I would fine it nice and would somtime buy the same thing. But when I bought it already, I felt guilty because the thing is no more appealing to me. So wasted is waht I would say. So how?? How am I going to change my perception of things and be able to react wisely to certain situations. I'm a total wreck!! In the Brain and emotionally. Haah!! You knoe, after writing this entry, I have no idea to what I just typed!! It's all in a mess!!! Argh!! Oh dear!!
Tangled Up.
I had a check-up at Outram regarding my menstrual cycle; which have been very irregular.
I have been consulted by this gynae since last year. I'm also under medication from her.
Then today, she said that she need me to have my blood checked and do some scanning.
I was confused at first, because of the sudden treatment.
Then, I was told that the venue for the blood test will be at NUH. It is so damn far away!
After a few minutes after she consulted me, the nurse came and told me more details
about the blood test. When finally, she told me the cost of the whole testing. It costed up to $150!
I was traumatic about the cost! I mean, it is so expensive!! I was very worried at that point. I didn't know how to react. I was kind of dumb founded for quite some time. I went out with my cousin and her frend. But I was not my usual self. I do laugh and joke around, at the back of my head, I was worried sick of how am I going to tell my mother the news. I know for sure that she will be very angry and of course, I will get the cold treatment from her. I know it's a waste of money to do all these tests.
True enough, when I got home, I got what I've expected once I drop the news to her. I know she was very upset. I was even more devastated! The blood test is on the 6th of December. Hai...
I know I am a trouble in the ass for my parents. But how can I say that I didn't mean this to happen? How can I am sorry to them. Because all I ever do is to give them problem. I am truly and deeply sorry. I knoe, whatever I do now will never be enough for them to ever forgive me. I'm tangled up. Inside and out. Physically, and mentally.
I HATE MY DAD!!!
I'm gonna be very straight 4ward now. I can't stand it no more.
I can't stand my dad!!! He's such an ass!!! I dun give a shit abt him!!
My aunt frm my dad side just came 2 visit. My aunt just had a divorce.
Then when they all went home, my dad came into the room and told his STUPID story!
Actuali, it happend like this. N (is short for the wife) D (Short for the husband) F (Short for asshole dad.)
F went to N&D house. Met N&D son at the MRT stn. He told F tat D askd F to wait at Foodcourt.
F, being the "Freaking Clever" felt sumting wrong. The same thing happnd the next time round when F went there again. A few months ltr, N&D had a divorce. Right now, F said tat the reason for the divorce is tat N never cooks. WHAT KIND OF BULL IS TAT?? TATS UTTERLY DEEP SHIT!!
Look, D is a chef at a Hotel. F said that it is WRONG for D to come home and cook for the Family.
And that N should be the ONE WHO SHOULD COOK!! What?!! Just becoz, N is the WIFe, and N have to do ALL THE COOKING?? Look, D is a CHEF!!! A CHEF can cook elaborate dishes for hotel guests for hours n hours long, but he can cook a typical dish for the family of 5?!!! I bet he can even cook the dishes within minutes!!! F said that D's tired of working. Yeah right?!! It's not like N didn't cook EVERYDAY!!! It's only happns occasionally. Fuck!!! F said we all CANNOT BLAME D!! Well, KISS MY BIG FAT ASS & OVER MY BIG FAT DEAD BODY!!! I will NEVER Respect D!!! Ever!!!
See, N is also working. Plus, when I was younger, my bro & I used to spend our hols at N&D house to sleepover. During our stay, they were one peaceful family. Honestly, N is very strict with her 3 children. She makes sure that the house chores are divided equally among the 3. In fact, she cooks well, and adequately when we were there. BUT, D always come home LATE at night!!!! Way pass bedtime!! OK, so what if D is a chef. He comes home late. But the house has food!!!
I also realised that during my stay, D rarely talks to his 3 children. He rarely asked for their well being. Some kind of a father dun U think? Yeah. Damn!
As for my Dad!! I feel like shouting at his face and tell him that not just becoz of D's wife doesn't cook, and that's why he want to divorce her!! That's one STUPID, CHILDISH, LAMEST, LOW CLASS, HOOLIGAN kind of excuse.
UGH!!! I JUST HATE MY DAD SO MUCH!!! I WOULD DO ANYTING TO TRADE FOR A FATHER!! YEAH!! I MEAN, HE IS SUCH A PAIN IN THE ASS. HE LOVES TO CONDEMN PEOPLE'S BEHAVIOUR. HE THINKS THAT WHATEVER HE SAYS IS ALWAYS RIGHT. AND WHEN YOU TRY TO CORRECT HIM, YOU WILL GET A SCOLDING INSTEAD. AND THEN, HE WILL TELL OTHERS; ESPECIALLY HIS FAMILY SIDE OF WHAT STUPID COMMENT YOU TRIED TO CORRECT HIM. ONE FAVOURITE PHRASE HE ALWAYS USE "I MAY BE STUPID, BUT I GOT A LOT OF EXPERIENCE!"
Message to Dad:
SCREW THE HELL OUT LA!!! IF YOU THINK WHAT EVER YOU SAY IS ALWAYS RIGHT, WELL, IF U THINK THAT U GOT TRUCK LOADS OF EXPERIENCE, THEN USE THEM TO GET A GOD DAMN JOB!!!! DON'T JUST SIT AT HOME AND CONDEMN PEOPLE. DO SOMETHING. GET A JOB AND GET EMPLOYED!!! SMART ASSS FREAK!!!!
ARRGGHHH!!!! I can't stand it no more. From now on, I will ignore my dad!!!
Just ignore him.
It Feels Good To Be Back!
SELAMAT HARI RAYA!!!!!!!!!!!
Finally, Fasting Month is Over with a Capital O!!!
Right now, I can indulge my Mum's Delicious Food!!!
However, I'm still haviong my runny nose and cough!!
But never mind, when it comes to food, I'm in front of the line!!!
Food Glorious Food....!!!
~ Ketupat
~ Satay Goreng (Fried Satay)
~ Kuah Opor (Opar Gravy)
~ Sambal Goreng Pengantin (Mum's Signature Dish!!)
~ Sambal Satay (Satay Dip!)
~ Serunding (Spiced Coconut Floss)
Yup, Those are the food that I can eat!!! yahoo!!!!
Well of course its nice!
My Mum cooked it and I helped her prepared them.
Also, I can eat all the cookies and Kuehs that I've baked!!
Yeah!!
My Baju Kurung this year is Gold!!
Yeah!!! Yellowish Gold! Very Nice!!!
I got new pair of shoes.
All In all, I love Hari Raya!!
So, to all Peeps celebrating Hari Raya
Maaf Zahir Batin.
Jika Ada tersalah silap,
Harap maafkan.
Translation: Selamat Hari Raya. Please Forgive all of my wrong doings.
