Cross-world

Wishful Thinking

Hi all. On my way home, I was thinking about me in the future. What lies ahead for me? What to expect? What I want to achieve in the future? Will I be a happier person? Will I survive all the obstacles that awaits me. Those questions made me think real hard and it somehow made me feel scared and sad. I know it's rather silly to think about this and feel so negatively about it. But I wasn't aware about it. It just hits me in the face. Bam!

I feel that I am not ready for this. I think I might not be able to handle the burden, sacrifices need to be made and be able to face any consequences. I might just break down and call it quits. However, there's another part of me who wants to fight and smell success and just be happy.

I feel like going to someplace far, so far that no one knows me so that I can start afresh. Only then, I don't have to be a chamelion - be in a constant change to please others. It's like there's no time for ME. Just me.

People say that I am always happy. I have nothing to worry about. No problems to think about. I'm a HAPPY-GO-LUCKY person. Right. How I wish those assumptions are true. Wouldn't it be nice huh?

I shall end this entry here.

posted by h0sriNa @ 10:10 PM